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Solving your writing problems since 1998! |
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The
Write Way
18 July 2008 How Much?! Greetings, Before we get started on this week's topic, let's pay a quick visit to last week's discussion of toothpaste. I had a couple of of people who expressed concern that I was encouraging the over-consumption of salt, so I'd better clarify ... I gave you my recipe for the natty, rat poison-free, engine degreaser-free tooth powder, and if you recall, that was 2 parts bi-carb soda and 1 part finely ground sea salt. I suggested you use about 1/8 of a teaspoon each time you brush ... Now, you're aware of my mathematical limitations, but by my reckoning, you'd only be using about 1/24 of a teaspoon of salt each time you brushed. The recommended daily allowance for adults in the US is 1 teaspoon or 2,300 mg, so that makes roughly 96 mg in our tooth powder. (In the UK, the RDA is just 1600 mg.) If you take a look at this table of salt in food, you'll see that 1 ounce of pretzels contains between 290 and 560 mg of salt (that's ONE ounce ... take a look at the size of the packet of pretzels in your cupboard ... Scary, isn't it?) One cup of tomato soup has between 700 and 1260 mg of salt. (Source) And here's a chart that shows you what's in commonly consumed fast foods: The final column is the sodium (salt) content of each item ... read it and weep. So, the message is clear, I hope: cut out on some of these processed foods, and you can afford to swap your engine degreaser for a smidge of salt and bi-carb soda!
Right, that's sorted. Thanks to everyone who took the time to comment ... it's good to know we're all aware of what goes into our systems these days. Now, back to the business of the day ... I know we're not alone in this, because most of the known world is facing the same massive petrol prices as we are out here. And I suppose there's some comfort in knowing we're not suffering alone ... some. I can remember when I had my First Car (I told you about my pride and joy some time ago) and I used to drive into the garage, flash a $1 note and ask the attendant (who'd be busy cleaning my windscreen and checking the oil and water) for "a dollar's worth of petrol, please." And that would be enough to get me in and out of the city and university for a week! But now ... it's a different kettle of fish all together. We're currently paying up to $1.70 per litre for unleaded petrol. There are roughly 2 pints to a litre and 8 pints to a gallon ... As our 'Murkin cousins would say, "you do the math." And please, you definitely do it because you already know that I'm not very good at maths. Whoever does the calculations, they always seem to turn out the same, and petrol prices go up and down on the whim of the petrol companies. Again, I imagine it's the same everywhere (surely we're not the only ones suffering this way) but prices rise steadily throughout the week, just in time for the weekend. And every time there's a public holiday or school holiday period, you can bet your life the prices will soar in readiness. There doesn't seem to be any logical reason for this. Once upon a time, the tanks would have to be emptied before a new price could be charged ... the innocent theory being that if the garage paid X for the petrol in its tanks, it would charge the same price for all that fuel. When it filled up its tanks and paid a higher price, then it could charge the petrol-using public a correspondingly higher price. And just as a by-the-by, do you remember the good old days when supermarkets had to sell out all their old stock before they could put prices up? ( I well recall my student days when we'd search at the back of all the shelves for old stock and lower prices.) Sigh ... that was then, this is now. But back to the current villain of the piece ... Our garages have huge signs advertising their prices (these can make you giddy as the prices change a number of times every day). The top price is for unleaded, then leaded or premium, then diesel (which used to be a fraction of the price of petrol, but is now soaring to dizzy heights well above petrol). I saw a wonderful cartoon last week, obviously penned by a disillusioned driver. It showed a typical sign outside a garage with the different grades of fuel listed as follows: LOL $1.69 OMG $1.75 WTF $1.89 Indeed! Which brings us, gnashing our teeth, to the topic suggested by Lark Underwood ... your favourite and mine - jargon! Every human activity has its jargon, so let's cast our baby blues over some of the motoring jargon you're likely to encounter. (And given the rate at which fuel prices are rising, this may soon be an academic exercise since none of us will be able to afford to drive a vehicle!) We'll just pretend you still have lots of money and can afford to not only own a car, but also to fill it with fuel and drive it (I did say we were pretending ...) so, where would you look for your: ABS AYS C/C GPS VIN? Give up? Here we go ... ABS - German initials for anti-blocking-system, now universally used for anti-lock brakes. By rapidly releasing and re-applying brake pressure, ABS prevents total brake lock-up in emergency situations, minimising stopping distances while retaining steering control AYC: Active Yaw Control, as used by Mitsubishi on later Evo models to sense and inhibit excessive understeer or oversteer - or yaw. A form of stability control. (And for your information ... we took a quick look at yaw some years back ... Not to be confused with yaws as you'll see when you get there!) C/C: Cruise control, you set the speed you want to maintain and the system automatically adjusts engine power to maintain that speed. You can override the system at any time by braking or accelerating. (Remind me to tell you the story of how our C/C tried to kill us on the open road a couple of years ago ...)GPS: Global Positioning System. The use of satellite-generated information to calculate a vehicle’s precise position, usually to within a few feet, almost anywhere. (And is it just me, or does anyone else think it's a somewhat worrying trend that drivers are being encouraged to watch a screen when they should be driving? I saw an article last weekend where some loony is proposing installing wireless Internet connections in vehicles. The thought of some of these laid-back drivers googling the new girl at the office while navigating traffic is enough to make you glad petrol is getting too expensive to drive any more!) VIN: Vehicle Identification Numbers. Another front-line security safeguard. Individual coded numbers for each car are etched or stamped onto numerous components, from body shell to windscreen and side windows to major mechanical assemblies. They can be seen without taking the car to pieces - in some cases without so much as opening the bonnet - and they’re very difficult to disguise or change.
So there you go! Now you have a few more acronyms to toss into the conversation over the weekend. And thank you to everyone who sent in suggestions for topics last week. If you think of any others, just hit Reply and send them in ... Remember, I'm planning another 500 issues, so I need lots of ideas! And for those of you tempted by delusions of expertise you don't possess to try your hand at car repairs, here are some terms you may need to know: HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive car parts not far from the object we are trying to hit. VISE-GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand. E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes and is ten times harder than any known drill bit. PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, as the name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads. This week's quiz: If you work in an office, deal with people who work in an office or live with someone who does, you'll have come across some of these terms. Match 'em up: deja moo, administrivia, deceptionist, meanderthal, acluistic, duck shuffler, adhocracy, smirting, anecgloat, rolling the tortoise 1. person who has difficulty expressing himself succinctly; often gives long, unfocused presentations 2. receptionist whose job is actually to delay or block potential visitors; ruthless with a polite, perfect smile 3. the state of being completely 'without a clue' 4. taking the opportunity to flirt with co-workers while huddled together for an outdoor cigarette break 5. story of one's exploits that is intended to impress; may be partly fictional 6. excessively increasing resources to accelerate an otherwise slow-moving project 7. minimally structured business where teams are formed as they are needed to address specific problems 8. nagging feeling that you've heard this B.S. before 9. someone who disrupts your affairs after you've finally gotten all your 'ducks in a row' 10. encompasses all the trivial tasks that management is far too qualified to suffer through And to simplify matters for do-it-yourselfers: The only two items you'll ever need for car maintenance are WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it moves and it shouldn't, use the duct tape; if it doesn't move and it should, use the WD-40. Did you know that every newsletter is archived? So if you've missed anything since 1998 or want to revisit some favourites, you can do so any time! Don't forget to bookmark the page when you get there ... or even make it your Home Page. (For Internet Explorer, just click on Tools ... Internet Options ... General ... fill in www.write101.com/archives/index.htm and click OK. For Netscape, select Edit ... Preferences. Then select Navigator from the left menu, click Home Page and enter the URL above next to Location and click OK. For all the flash new browsers, you'll have to do a search on my mate google to find what to do. There's a search box on the archives page!) If you've received this little missive from a friend, you can get your very own issue, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed every Friday morning by clicking here: mailto:WritingTips-subscribe@yahoogrups.com And I'm even prepared to offer a shameless bribe. An Ape that wants to play Hamlet after being type-cast as King Kong, a talking anvil and that rottweiller ... Dr Morgenes is still caught in the nightmare that is the casting couch. Help him find a plot! Just click on the Comments button at the end of the entry to add your contribution. If you have friends who fancy themselves as writers, invite them to contribute (just forward this newsletter in its entirety to them). I often trawl this for comments to post on my site ... so if you say something about the newsletter or site, be warned, you may end up being read by one of the 2,000+ unique visitors who visit Write101 every day! Make your Mark on the World. Then stop by our Map of the World and read the messages. (Just click List) and add your mark. Last week's quiz: Try these dental terms and you'll be able to carry on a lively conversation with your dentist when you run into him/her at the supermarket ... you won't have to visit any more after you've read this week's LSE! pulpectomy, curettage, hyperemia, parasthesia, lingua villosa nigra, prophylaxis, pyorrhea, xerostomia, malocclusion, trench mouth 1. occurs when a person’s mouth lacks sufficient saliva to keep it moist - XEROSTOMIA 2. temporary or permanent loss of sensation that can occur after oral surgery. The numbness results from pressure or damage to the nerve usually occurs after an extraction and affects the tissues of the mouth including the tongue cheek lip or chin - PARASTHESIA 3. teeth are out of alignment crooked or crowded - MALOCCLUSION 4. the removal of dead inner tissue from a gum pocket - CURETTAGE 5. highly painful form of gingivitis or gum inflammation; symptoms include pain in the gums, bleeding gums, red swollen gums, greyish film on gums, deep ulcers between the teeth, foul taste and odour in mout, fever - TRENCH MOUTH 6. procedures of dental scaling and dental polishing - PROPHYLAXIS 7. increased blood flow to pulp tissue (inflamed tissue) can cause dental sensitivity and may lead to an abscess - HYPEREMIA 8. the excessive growth of fungi that normally live in the mouth; possibly as a result of an overgrowth of the bacteria normally present in the mouth causing a discoloration of the tongue.; this extra tissue can get stained by food or tobacco and become yellowish brown or black; bacteria can then accumulate on the finger-like projections from the surface of the tongue (papillae) - LINGUA VILLOSA NIGRA (Also known as "black hairy tongue" and if that's not enough to make you look after your teeth, I don't know what is!) 9. common endodontic procedure in which the dental pulp and root canal are completely removed - PULPECTOMY 10. an advanced stage of periodontal disease in which the ligaments and bones that support the teeth become inflamed and infected; usually a result of gingivitis a periodontal disease that infects the gum through plaque leading to the formation of a pocket between the teeth that trap the plaque; can cause halitosis (bad breath) in which the jaw bone is slowly eroded due to painful and bleeding gums. Eventually the loss of tooth support can cause tooth loss and this disease is the primary cause of tooth loss in adults - PYORRHEA
And a true story to finish with ... (No, really, it is. Would I lie to you, Honey?) From the Sydney Morning Herald, Australia, comes this story of a central west couple who drove their spluttering car to the city and only just made it to a parking lot in a major shopping mall. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car there in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underwear turned private parts into glaringly public ones. Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was leaning on the side of the car. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his head. A Little Something Extra Since not every one will need a car-jargon buster, here are some glossaries of other commonly used types of jargon: If visiting your library leaves you dry-mouthed with worry, fear no more, my little one. Here's everything you need to know to converse knowledgeably with librarians. Find your way fearlessly around the Internet with this jargon buster. All there is to know about the conservation of books and book-binding (go on ... 'fess up, you've had a secret longing to know!) Every word you need about publishing a newsletter. Hot-air ballooning more your thing? Say no more! Prefer to twiddle your dials? Then you'll need to know some ham radio terms. If your military jargon extends no further than "Hello, sailor!" you'll need this. Word of the week: al desco Describes any meal eaten at your desk, particularly "deskfast." Oxymoron of the week: cheap petrol And you'll be able to sue this week's Latin phrase the next time you visit your garage: Quantis? Minime nimium! [KWON-tees mee-NEE-may NEE-mee-oom] (How much? That's too dear!) Did you know that you can have your very own Latin reminders? How about undies proclaiming, Bene est rex esse? (It's good to be king) Or a shopping bag that warns, Emptrix nata sum (Born to shop)? Kind regards, Jennifer P.S. Want to donate to the upkeep of this newsletter? Just $17 a year seems a small price to pay for all this wit and wisdom, don't you think? C'mon, that's just a tad more than 30 cents a week! 1.Toss a few pennies into my Running Away Fund at PayPal (Send to jennifer @ write101.com ... without the spaces, of course) OR 2. Click here to subscribe for a full year OR 3. Use your credit card on my secure order form. (You can also access the PayPal subscription link from this page if the link above didn't work for you. With PayPal, you can use your credit card, PayPal account or pay online using your own cheque account.) OR 4. Send a cheque (made payable to Jennifer Stewart) To unsubscribe from this list, send
a blank email to: mailto:WritingTips- Copyright Jennifer Stewart 2008 Individual articles copyrighted by their authors. |
