The Write Way

22 July 2005

Greetings,

Have you been watching the Tour de France? Little ripper of a race, isn't it? And what about that Lance Armstrong? Now there's a bloke who's worthy of our admiration. Not just for the way he manages to get through this gruelling physical ordeal (all the other riders go through the same). And not just because he's managed to beat his cancer (lots of other people do this, too).

No, what I like most about Lance Armstrong is the way he's stayed such a nice, unassuming person despite everything he's done. Maybe he's just a great actor, but I don't think so. He seems genuinely grateful for his life and is ready to spend the rest of it inspiring others to rise above any obstacles Life sets before them. We need more people like him!

Sigh ... I can't even ride a bicycle.

Dreadful, isn't it? To get to this stage in life and not be able to do something that some little kids can do before they can walk? (Both my kids were whizzing around on little tricycles before they could walk, and even my mother used to ride a bike with them until she was into her seventies, so I know it's not genetic.)

I was reminded of this shortcoming while watching the TdF on telly these past few days. We look forward to this event each year and had put it near the top of our To-Do-When-We-Win-Lotto list. I love watching the scenery almost as much as those fellows on their bikes. It's a spectacular country and some of the mountains ... Wow!

We're always fascinated by the number of white campervans and motor-homes that manage to cling to the edge of those precipitous roads. When we first started watching (only about 4 years ago) we noticed a few vans along the side of the road in places and used to think what fun it would be to follow the race like this. But this year, there were thousands of the little buggers ... Wall-to-wall white campervans ... as far as the eye could see.

So we've reluctantly moved the TdF further down our List and are now thinking it might be better to tackle the Pyrenees when the road is a tad less travelled. 

But I was unburdening myself about my shortcomings in the bike-riding department, and I must get it over with ... It's not as if I haven't tried to ride a bike, I have, but I had a couple of Nasty Experiences in my impressionable years that have left their scars - figurative if not literal.

The first was when I was 5, and one of the local lads offered to give me a ride on the handlebars of his bike ... down our gravel street. Need I say more? For the next month when I was out in public, strangers on trains hugged their children to them and averted their faces ... the Phantom of the Opera and I had a lot in common for a short time!

I managed to avoid bike-riding for many years, and since we lived within walking distance of my schools, I never had the need to perfect this skill. It wasn't until I was married and a mother that I again tried to ride ... After all, if my 2 and 4-year-old could do it, surely I could? Right?

Hmmm ... We were living in a village in the Southern Highlands of NSW at the time, and the Love of My Life decided it would be good to get a bicycle so he could take the kids riding along all the lovely little quiet, country lanes as they became more proficient on their bikes. (Being able to balance while stationary on two wheels wasn't proficient enough for him?)

Or not ... You see concerted means, "involving the joint activity of two or more," so it's a bit difficult to do it on your own! This word comes from the Latin words con "together, with" and certare "to strive." 

Whenever you see the prefix con, look for meanings associated with doing things together, such as:

conform  (con + formare "to shape") to correspond in form or character; be similar

concur  (con + currere "to run")  to be of the same opinion; agree

conclude  (con + claudere "to shut") to bring to an end; close

I think you get the idea ...

This week's quiz:

Righto. On yer bike, mate! Match 'em up:

cleat, derailleur, peloton, velodrome, criterium, domestique, echelon, repechage, bidon, etape

1. member of a competitive bicycle-racing team whose role is to assist the team leader, as by setting the pace 

2. a race in which runners-up in the eliminating heats compete for a place in the final race 

3. metal or plastic attachment on the sole of the cycling shoe that fits into an opening to fasten the shoe to the pedal 

4. French name for the drinking bottles that are inserted into bottle cages 

5. staggered line of riders, each downwind of the rider immediately ahead. Can move considerably faster than a solo rider or small group of riders 

6. device for shifting gears on a bicycle by moving the chain between sprocket wheels of different sizes 

7. the place where troops on the march halt over night; also, by extension, the distance marched during a day; a stage in a major bike race 

8. track built specifically for bicycle racing, made up of two long straights and two short, curved end sections that are sharply banked 

9. in competitive cycling, a densely packed group of riders who stay together for their mutual advantage 

10.a bicycle race of a specified number of laps on a closed course over public roads closed to normal traffic 

A man on a bike, carrying two sacks on his shoulders, was stopped by a guard while crossing the border.

"What's in the bags?" asked the guard.

"Sand," the cyclist replied.

"Get them off. We need to take a look."

The guard emptied the bags and found out they contained nothing but sand. The man reloaded his bags and continued across the border. A week later, the same man was crossing again with two more bags. The guard demanded to see them, and again they contained nothing but sand. This continued every week for six months, until one day the cyclist failed to appear. A few days later, that same guard ran into the cyclist in the city.

"Hey, where have you been?" the guard asked. "You sure had us wondering! We knew you were smuggling something across the border. So tell me and I won't say a word. What was it?"

The man smiled and said, "Bicycles!"

Remember, you can browse all 345 previous issues of this newsletter in the Archives here

And read articles about all aspects of writing here

If you're planning to change jobs or to seek a promotion, you'll need to bring your resume up to date ... Drop by my new site to see how I can help you get that all-important interview here!

I know many of you enjoy hearing about life Down Under, so I've set up a new site with some articles about my little corner of the world. I'll be adding to this all the time, so when you get there, remember to add it to your Favorites folder: Travel to Australia

Last week's quiz:

belomancy, alchemy, mnemonist, bunyip, déjà vu, conjuration, psychokinetic, doppelganger, harpy, mandala

1. vicious winged monster; often depicted as a bird with the head of a woman - HARPY

2. a ritual recitation of words or sounds believed to have a magical effect - CONJURATION

3. turning baser metals into gold or silver by chemical means - ALCHEMY

4. any of various geometric designs (usually circular) symbolizing the universe; used chiefly in Hinduism and Buddhism as an aid to meditation - MANDALA

5. imaginary monster inhabiting swamps and lagoons - BUNYIP

6. the experience of thinking that a new situation had occurred before - DÉJÀ VU

7.  a kind of divination anciently practiced by means of marked arrows drawn at random from a bag or quiver, the marks on the arrows drawn being supposed to foreshow the future; the advice tied to the arrow which travels the furthest is thought to be valid - BELOMANCY

8. someone able to perform unusual feats of memory - MNEMONIST

9. moving an object without apparent use of physical means - PSYCHOKINETIC

10.a ghostly double of a living person that haunts its living counterpart - DOPPELGANGER

A cyclist was walking home from the velodrome one day when his friend, another cyclist, rode up on an incredible shiny new bicycle. The first was stunned and asked, "Where did you get such a nice bike?" 

The second replied, "Well, yesterday I was walking home minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, 'Take what you want!'"

The first cyclist nodded approvingly, "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fitted you."

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A Little Something Extra

Can you imagine all the inspiration you can get for a book from the Tour de France? Characters, settings, intrigue, politicking ... it's all there. Here's all the raw material you need for any sort of novel or short story ... or article ... or ... Just do it!

Official Tour de France website: http://www.letour.fr/2005/TDF/LIVE/us/1600/index.html 

If cycling's not your Thing ... just use France as a setting for your writing!

Official France Tourism website: http://www.francetourism.com/ 

Check out all the places to see and visit here: http://www.france.com/ 

And don't forget to call me when you're going, and I'll carry your bags!

Word of the week: Bonk (n or vb) Cycling's classic term for blowing up, hitting the wall or otherwise expiring in mid-ride. Can be caused by, and is frequently blamed on, insufficient water or calorie intake, but in truth is usually a result of insufficient training; that horrible feeling when your body runs out of fuel on a long distance cycle ride

An interesting word that has different connotations in other circles!

Oxymoron of the week: as easy as riding a bike (Yeah ... right!)

We have a family saying that was coined about the time of my close encounter with our veggie patch: "As easy as falling off a bike."

And this week's Latin phrase is one you can use when you encounter your own bike-riding moment:

Spero melior ( I hope for better things)

[SPAY-roh MAY-lee-or]

Kind regards,

Jennifer

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Copyright 2005 Jennifer Stewart

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