The Write Way

23 August 2002

"We'll Aal be rooned ..."

Greetings,

You know, we're a weird mob ... We're never satisfied, are we?

I've been bragging unashamedly over recent weeks about our glorious winter weather ... Clear blue skies, bright sunshine ... you've heard it all, haven't you? But there's a price to pay for all this - no rain. Here in Queensland, we've been going through the driest conditions since the mid-nineties and over 41 regions have been declared drought-stricken.

Summer is usually our wet season, but this year Brisbane (the city and suburbs) had its driest summer since 1912, and some areas of the state recorded their hottest summers since 1897. So that didn't augur well for winter.

As the driest inhabited continent (only Antarctica is dryer because some 70% of its water is frozen solid), we've learnt to live with this - after a fashion. We have constant water restrictions. Where I live we can only use sprinklers on the garden for a couple of hours night and morning, three days a week. (The council plays a game of 'odds and evens' - if you live in a house with an odd number, you can use fixed sprinklers Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays; even house numbers have their turn on Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays, and Monday is a no-go day.)

We can use hand-held hoses any time - but by definition, that means that the rest of your body has to be attached to the hand ... and there just aren't enough hours in the day for that! So we practise a bit of Triage - save the walking wounded - and concentrate our water on garden plants, shrubs and trees rather than lawn ... The result has been that our normal green lawns and parks have turned an interesting shade of brown.

The weather bureau has been predicting rain and showers on and off all winter ... Don't these blokes ever stick their heads out the window to look at the sky? In the Good Old Days, weather forecasters were people who knew how to read the clouds and follow weather patterns. But this lot with their satellites, computers and what-not ... Hopeless!

Last weekend, we noticed all the local ants were starting to build ramparts around their nests and we got all excited ... rain was coming! They never fail to predict rain - and they don't need multi-million dollar gear.

Sure enough, it started to rain Tuesday night ... and, you guessed it ... it hasn't stopped since!

This little poem is a perfect expression of what I mentioned at the beginning of these ramblings. Read it out aloud - it's great fun ... Naww, don't worry about what the person next to you thinks - sometimes you just have to seize the moment!

(Note: Out here, an ass is an animal - like a donkey, and its name rhymes with "lass" and "gas" ... just to avoid any confusion!)

Said Hanrahan

"We'll all be rooned", said Hanrahan,
In accents most forlorn,
Outside the church, ere Mass began,
One frosty Sunday morn.

The congregation stood about
Coat collars to the ears,
And talked of stock and crops and drought
As it had done for years.

"It's lookin' crook," said Daniel Croke,
"Bedad it's crook me lad,
But never since the banks went broke
Has seasons been so bad."

"It's dry all right," said young O'Neil,
With which astute remark,
He squatted down upon his heel
And chewed a piece of bark.

And so around the chorus ran,
"It's keepin' dry no doubt."
"We'll all be rooned," said Hanrahan,
"Before the year is out.

"The crops are done, you'll have your work
To save one bag of grain.
From here way out to Back o' Bourke
They're singing out for rain.

"They're singin' out for rain," he said,
"And all the tanks are dry."
The congregation scratched its head
And gazed around the sky.

"There won't be grass, in any case
Enough to feed and ass,
There's not a blade on Casey's place
As I came down to Mass."

"If rain don't come this month," said Dan,
And cleared his throat to speak,
"We'll all be rooned," said Hanrahan,
"If rain don't come this week."

A heavy silence seemed to steal
On all at his remark,
And each man squatted on his heel,
And chewed a piece of bark.

"We want an inch of rain, we do,"
O'Neil observed at last.
But Croke maintained we wanted two,
To put the danger past.

"If we don't get three inches man,
Or four to break this drought,
We'll all be rooned," said Hanrahan,
"Before the year is out."

In God's good time, down came the rain,
And all the afternoon,
On iron roof and window pane,
It drummed a homely tune.

And through the night it pattered still,
And lightsome, gladsome elves,
On dripping spout and window sill,
Kept talking to themselves.

It pelted, pelted all day long,
A-singing at its work,
Till every heart took up the song,
Way out to Back o' Bourke.

And every creek a banker ran,
And dams filled overtop.
"We'll all be rooned," said Hanrahan,
"If this rain doesn't stop."

And stop it did in God's good time,
And Spring came into fold.
A mantle o'er the hills sublime,
Of green and pink and gold.

And days went by on dancing feet,
With harvest hopes immense,
And laughing eyes beheld the wheat,
Nid-nodding o'er the fence.

And, oh, the smiles on every face,
As happy lad and lass,
Through grass knee deep on Casey's place,
Went riding down to Mass.

While round the church in clothes genteel,
Discoursed the men of mark,
And each man squatted on his heel,
And chewed a piece of bark.

"There'll be bush fires for sure, me man,
There will without a doubt.
We'll all be rooned," said Hanrahan.
"Before the year is out."

(John O'Brien)

Isn't that terrific? And oh-so true!

Anyone who lives at a country town will relate to the sentiments.

Or maybe "anyone who lives IN a country town ...?

It's often tricky knowing which preposition to use when referring to places. A good rule of thumb is to use "at" for small towns, villages etc and save "in" for countries, states, cities or big places.

For example, you could work IN London, but live AT Pratt's Bottom ... or Wigtwizzle ...or Little Rollright even. I hasten to add that I have no idea if any of these places are within commuting distance of London. I found them in my Ideas Notebook - under the heading "Impossibly Wonderful Names (real) UK." 

If you enjoyed the poem, the information below on John O'Brien comes from here. 

"(1878-1952) Father Patrick Joseph Hartigan wrote under the pen-name of John O'Brien. He was the parish priest of Narrandera, New South Wales for 27 years. He was born at O'Connell Town, Yass NSW on 13th October 1878, his parents came from Lisseycasey, County Clare, Ireland.

"Father Hartigan was one of the first curates in the state to own a motor car. In 1911 he took the last rites to Jack Riley of Bringenbong (The Man From Snowy River). His first poetry was published in local journals from 1906 and in 1921 he produced 'Around the Boree Log and other Verses' under the pseudonym of John O'Brien.

The Narrandera Shire Council celebrates this great poet with a three-day John O'Brien Festival coinciding with St. Patrick's Day each year in March."

You'll find more of John O'Brien's poetry here, and I especially recommend "Tangmalangaloo." 

Thanks again for supporting my Running Away Fund - now I have some more great places to visit!

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I had a couple of people contact me last week asking about the other newsletter I mentioned. Here it is:  Advertising Tips (which I know many of you already subscribe to as well).

This week's quiz:

Match up the words with their meanings:

fiscal, catholic, laconic, mendacious, temporal, sartorial, sardonic, perfunctory, terrestrial, querulous

1. concise

2. of men's clothes

3. tendency to tell lies

4. of the earth

5. in a superficial way

6. pertaining to time

7. of public revenue

8. complaining or peevish

9. scornful or sneering

10.of universal interest

If you enjoy a good pun (or a terrible one) you'll love these:

The lease said, "sauna's mended." (The least said, soonest mended.)

Good pie; missed the chips. (Goodbye, Mr Chips.)

An elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle asleep on a log. So, he ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river.

"What did you do that for?" Asked a passing giraffe.

"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago."

"Wow, what a memory" commented the giraffe.

"Yes," said the elephant, "turtle recall."

 OK, only one more, I promise ...

Recently a fellow in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, getting in and out past security, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of petrol.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, "I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."

Last week's quiz:

Each list below consists of four words. Three of them are related in meaning – find the odd word:

1. bewilder perplex obfuscate CLARIFY

2. redolent FORTUITOUS suggestive fragrant

3. ramification CONVERGENCE branch consequences

4. sweet syrupy SOUR saccharine

5. vicissitude change SIMILARITY variance

6. model example PLATITUDE paradigm

7. ruminate think ponder SKIM

8. hopeful optimistic SHAMEFUL sanguine

9. VICARIOUS direct personal own

10. sophisticated worldly suave URBANE

Thanks to everyone who's left a message and stuck a pin on the map - it's never too late ... 

A Little Something Extra

Have you ever read one of those Mills and Boon books and thought to yourself, "I could do that?" Then have I got a surprise for you!

"When a manuscript lands on a Harlequin Romance editor's desk, we turn the first page with anticipation. Our biggest hope is that we'll discover an exciting new talent — and this is our top 10 wish list for the story we're about to read…."

To find exactly what Harlequin publishers want, click here. 

Word of the week: Soothfast (adj) Truthful; honest; loyal.

Sadly this wonderful Anglo-Saxon word is now listed as archaic ... let's hear it for all our soothfast friends out there, I say!

Tautology of the week: Do you have a leaky colander lying around in your bottom cupboard? Toss it out right now and get a new one!

This week's Latin phrase may refer to your success when you send off your hot romance to Harlequin:

Hodie mihi,cras tibi. (Mine today, yours tomorrow.)

Regards,

Jennifer

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